Have you ever noticed how the questions you ask yourself can shape your entire day? It’s true! From the moment we wake up, we’re constantly asking ourselves questions, whether we realize it or not.
The problem is that we’re asking very disempowering questions without realizing it. For example, questions like “Why is this so hard?” or “Why aren’t there more hours in the day?” are just a few of the disempowering questions we ask ourselves.
On the flip side, empowering questions can be a game-changer. By asking ourselves better, more empowering questions, we can change the way we think, feel, and act.
The truth is that our brain is like a super-smart assistant that’s always ready to help you out. In fact, it’s like a Google search bar – if you give it a great question, it will come up with great answers.
Think about it this way: when you ask yourself, “Why is my job so stressful?” your brain starts listing all the reasons why your job might be stressful. But if you change the question to something like, “How can I make my workday more enjoyable?” your brain begins to look for ways to improve your day.
By focusing on high-quality questions, we can tap into our inner wisdom and creativity. This isn’t just about positive thinking—it’s about opening up possibilities and finding solutions that we might not have considered before.
In the fast-paced world of accounting, where deadlines and detailed work can sometimes feel overwhelming, empowering questions can make a huge difference. They help us shift from a problem-focused mindset to a solution-oriented approach.
In fact, by asking ourselves better questions, we can reduce stress, increase our productivity, and improve our overall well-being. It’s about taking control of our thoughts and directing our brains to find the best possible answers.
I’m telling you, once you learn to ask the right questions, you’ll be amazed at how different you feel. I have seen it time and time again for myself and my coaching clients – the right questions can make a big difference in your life, unlocking new levels of creativity, motivation, and satisfaction in your professional and personal life.
This week, I’m going to discuss the importance of questions, reframing disempowering questions, and offer more examples of reframing disempowering questions to more empowering ones.
The importance of questions
First off, it’s really amazing how the questions we ask ourselves shape how we think and feel. For example, when we ask things like, “Why am I so bad at this?” we end up focusing on our problems and feeling discouraged. This kind of question can make us feel stuck and unable to see solutions.
But when we ask, “What can I learn from this?” we start looking for ways to improve and grow. These better questions help us feel more positive and capable, opening up new possibilities and making us more proactive in finding solutions.
Our mindset becomes more optimistic, and we become more resilient in facing challenges. But how can you tell the difference between an empowering versus disempowering question?
Empowering questions open up possibilities and help us find solutions. For example, asking, “How can I manage my time better?” can lead to useful ideas and actions that make us more efficient. These questions encourage us to think creatively and focus on what we can do, rather than what’s holding us back.
On the other hand, disempowering questions make us feel stuck and negative. Asking, “Why am I always so disorganized?” just makes us feel worse and doesn’t help us find solutions. Instead of motivating us to improve, these questions reinforce negative beliefs and make us feel more overwhelmed.
As accountants, the questions we ask can really impact our workday. Questions like, “How can I handle my workload better?” can help us stay organized and productive.
This kind of question directs our focus toward practical steps we can take to manage our tasks more effectively, leading to a more efficient and satisfying workday.
On the other hand, questions like, “Why am I so stressed?” can make us feel even more overwhelmed. These negative questions can amplify our stress levels and make it harder to find solutions.
It’s important to shift from negative questions to ones that help us find answers and feel more in control.
Another benefit of asking better questions is that we can improve our mindset and productivity. For example, instead of thinking, “Why is this client so difficult?” try asking, “How can I communicate better with this client?”
This simple change can make our work much easier and more satisfying. Better communication can lead to smoother interactions and more successful outcomes.
When we choose to ask empowering questions, we take control of our thoughts and direct our brains to find the best possible answers. This practice helps us stay focused on solutions, reduces stress, and enhances our overall well-being.
By being mindful of the questions we ask, we can create a more positive and productive mindset.
Reframing disempowering questions
So how can you become more mindful of the questions you ask and reframe disempowering questions? First, identify the negative questions you often ask yourself.
These are questions that make you feel stuck or frustrated, like “Why is my job so stressful?” Recognizing these negative questions is the first step to changing them.
It’s important to be honest with yourself about the questions you commonly ask and understand how they affect your mood and actions.
Next, reframe these questions into positive, empowering ones. For example, change “Why is my job so stressful?” to “How can I manage stress effectively while enjoying my work?” This small shift helps your brain focus on solutions rather than problems.
By asking better questions, you encourage your mind to find creative and constructive answers. This practice can transform your mindset from one of frustration to one of proactive problem-solving.
As busy accountants and moms managing our workload and our families, reframing disempowering questions can make a huge difference. Instead of feeling overwhelmed, ask yourself, “How can I prioritize my tasks to be more efficient?”
This question encourages you to find ways to organize your work better and use your time wisely. You might discover new methods or tools that help you streamline your tasks and reduce stress.
When trying to balance work and family life, try asking, “How can I ensure I have time for my family while excelling at work?” This helps you think about ways to set boundaries and manage your time so you can not only do well at work, but still have quality time with your family.
If professional growth is important to you, consider asking, “What skills can I develop to advance in my career?” This question motivates you to identify areas for improvement and seek out opportunities for learning and development.
It encourages a growth mindset, which is essential for continuous improvement and career advancement.
If you’re in public accounting and building strong client relationships is important to you, think about asking, “How can I provide even better service to my clients?” This helps you focus on ways to enhance your interactions and support your clients more effectively.
You can also incorporate empowering questions into your daily life to stay positive and focused. Start your day with a morning question like, “What can I do today to make it great?”
This sets a positive tone for the day and helps you approach tasks with enthusiasm and optimism. It primes your mind to look for opportunities to make your day successful and enjoyable.
One of the most empowering questions I ask myself throughout the day is, “How are you feeling?” The reason this has been a game-changer for me is that since my feelings drive my actions, then by checking in with how I’m feeling I can make a change if necessary.
For example, if I ask myself, “How are you feeling?” and the answer is stressed or overwhelmed, I have the chance to pivot to a more helpful and useful emotion. This question has made it possible for me to get more done in less time and to be extremely productive and efficient.
Regular check-ins keep me focused and help me avoid feeling overwhelmed. As I tell my coaching clients all the time, “You cannot get accounting work done efficiently or manage your time effectively if you’re feeling an unhelpful emotion.”
Another helpful way to incorporate empowering questions is to end your day by reviewing your answers and progress. Use questions like, “What went well today and what can I improve for tomorrow?”
This reflection helps you recognize your achievements and identify areas for growth. It also sets you up for a positive start the next day.
To keep these empowering questions top of mind, use post-it notes or digital reminders. This will help you stay consistent and make positive thinking a habit. Visual reminders can be placed in areas you frequently see, like your workspace or your phone screen.
The truth is that by regularly asking empowering questions, you’ll train your brain to focus on solutions rather than problems. Over time, you’ll be pleasantly surprised at the significant improvements in your productivity, stress levels, and overall well-being.
More examples of reframing disempowering questions to more empowering ones
Before I end, I want to share more examples of how you can reframe disempowering questions to more empowering ones. If you’re like most people, you probably don’t even realize how often you ask disempowering questions, but by seeing examples of how to reframe them, it will be much easier to catch and pivot when it happens.
Here are some examples that might be helpful:
Disempowering Question: “Why is my job so stressful?”
Empowering Question: “How can I manage stress effectively while enjoying my work?”
Disempowering Question: “Why do I always have so much to do?”
Empowering Question: “How can I prioritize my tasks to be more efficient?”
Disempowering Question: “Why can’t I find a balance between work and family?”
Empowering Question: “How can I ensure I have time for my family while excelling at work?”
Disempowering Question: “Why am I not advancing in my career?”
Empowering Question: “What skills can I develop to advance in my career?”
Disempowering Question: “Why is this client so difficult?”
Empowering Question: “How can I improve communication with this client?”
Disempowering Question: “Why am I always so disorganized?”
Empowering Question: “What systems can I put in place to stay organized?”
Disempowering Question: “Why do I always procrastinate?”
Empowering Question: “How can I better manage my time to meet all my deadlines?”
Disempowering Question: “Why can’t I ever get things right?”
Empowering Question: “What can I learn from my mistakes to improve in the future?”
Disempowering Question: “Why is it so hard to stay motivated?”
Empowering Question: “What can I do to stay motivated and engaged in my work?”
Disempowering Question: “Why can’t this be easier?”
Empowering Question: “How can I make this easier on myself?”
Disempowering Question: “Why do I feel like I’m not good enough?”
Empowering Question: “What are my strengths and how can I use them to succeed?”
Disempowering Question: “Why is it so hard to find new clients?”
Empowering Question: “What strategies can I use to attract and retain new clients?”
Disempowering Question: “Why don’t people appreciate my work?”
Empowering Question: “How can I communicate my value more effectively?”
Disempowering Question: “Why do I struggle with change?”
Empowering Question: “How can I embrace change and see it as an opportunity for growth?”
Disempowering Question: “Why am I always so overwhelmed?”
Empowering Question: “What can I do to simplify my tasks and reduce stress?”
Disempowering Question: “Why do I never have enough time for myself?”
Empowering Question: “How can I make self-care a priority in my daily routine?”
Disempowering Question: “Why do I find it hard to stay focused?”
Empowering Question: “What can I do to improve my concentration?”
Disempowering Question: “Why can’t I ever stick to my goals?”
Empowering Question: “How can I set realistic goals and create a plan to achieve them?”
If you related to a lot of the disempowering questions and recognize that you ask them more than you realized, just know that after listening to this episode, you’ll be much more aware than you’ve ever been. Once you give your brain optional empowering questions to ask, they then become your default.
So just know that although it’s completely normal to ask disempowering questions, you never need to be stuck with disempowering answers.
Questions to consider:
Question: What specific negative questions do I find myself asking regularly? Identifying these questions will help you understand the patterns in your thinking and where you can start making changes.
Question: How can I reframe these negative questions into more empowering ones? This step is crucial for shifting your mindset from problem-focused to solution-oriented, helping you to feel more in control and proactive.
Question: What impact do these new empowering questions have on my daily life and work? Reflecting on the changes will help you see the benefits of this practice and encourage you to continue developing positive habits.