When was the last time you did something just for yourself—and actually loved every second of it? If you’re like most working moms, you probably can’t remember.
The idea of taking time for yourself might even feel impossible. But what if you could carve out space that not only feels doable but also brings you joy and leaves you refreshed? That’s what I want to talk about today: the secret to creating a retreat that’s just for you—and one you’ll actually love.
Life as a working mom can be nonstop, can’t it? There’s always another task, another deadline, another person who needs your attention.
Somewhere in the chaos, it’s easy to lose sight of what makes you feel good. Maybe you’ve thought about taking a break or even dreamed of a spa day or a quiet weekend, but the idea fades because it feels like too much effort—or too much to ask.
Here’s the thing: it’s not about the retreat being perfect or extravagant. It’s about creating a moment for yourself that feels meaningful. Something that lets you breathe, recharge, and reconnect with what you need. But how do you even begin to make that happen?
If the idea of creating your own retreat sounds exciting, but also a little intimidating, you’re not alone. Many of us hesitate to take time for ourselves because we feel guilty or think it’s selfish.
But here’s a secret: the better you take care of yourself, the better you can take care of everyone else. It’s not indulgent; it’s smart.
The beauty of a retreat is that it can be anything you want it to be. It doesn’t have to cost a lot of money, take a lot of time, or require you to leave home.
It could be as simple as a peaceful morning with your favorite book or an afternoon doing something you love. The key is making it intentional—and making it something you’ll genuinely enjoy.
So, let me ask you: what would it take for you to create that space for yourself? What would your perfect retreat look like? And more importantly, are you ready to discover how to make it happen?
In this episode, I want to talk about how you can uncover the secret to creating a retreat that works for you—without guilt or overwhelm. Because, you deserve it.
This week, I’m going to discuss why we rarely take time for ourselves as working moms and how to create a retreat that feels possible and perfect for you.
Why we rarely take time for ourselves as working moms
Being an accountant mom means that we’re professionals, parents, partners, friends, and so much more.
We’re constantly balancing work deadlines, school drop-offs, meal planning, and a never-ending list of responsibilities. With so many people relying on us, it can feel impossible to carve out even a sliver of time for ourselves.
And let’s talk about guilt for a second. Even when the thought of stepping away crosses our minds, we immediately second-guess it. How often have you thought, “I should be using this time to catch up on work, run errands, or tackle the to-do list”?
Or maybe you’ve worried, “What will my family or coworkers think if I take time for me?” That guilt can be loud, can’t it? It makes us feel like taking care of ourselves is selfish when, in reality, it’s the furthest thing from it.
But it’s not just the guilt we feel—it’s the judgment we fear from others. I’ll never forget a moment from when my kids were younger. Every so often, I’d head upstate to my parents’ trailer on a lake by myself for a much-needed break. The kids stayed home with their dad, and it was a way for me to recharge.
At the time, I was part of a PTA bowling league, and one Monday, I mentioned to the group that I’d gone upstate by myself that previous weekend. The room went silent, and I felt twenty pairs of eyes staring at me.
Finally, one woman spoke up, almost shocked, “By yourself? Who took care of the kids?” I simply said, “Their dad did.” You could feel the judgment ripple through the room.
But then something amazing happened. One of my friends quietly came over later and whispered, “Good for you.” She didn’t say it out loud because of the way the other women reacted, but her words meant everything to me in that moment.
It was a small reminder that taking care of myself wasn’t wrong—it was necessary. And it also showed me that women have a hard time not judging someone who is doing something they probably secretly wish they’d give themselves permission to do.
And that’s the problem, isn’t it? As working moms, we’re not only battling our own inner guilt, but we’re also trying to push past the societal pressure to do it all without ever stepping away. It’s no wonder we feel like we’re running on fumes.
The truth is, constantly putting ourselves last has consequences. Over time, we lose pieces of ourselves. We forget what it feels like to relax, to enjoy life, or to even ask ourselves what we need.
But here’s what I’ve learned over the past 33 years being an accountant and a mom: making time for ourselves isn’t selfish—it’s the kindest thing we can do for our families. When we’re rested, recharged, and connected to ourselves, we show up better for everyone else.
And it doesn’t have to mean a week-long vacation or a trip to a fancy spa. It can be something as simple as a quiet morning, a peaceful afternoon, or a day doing something that lights us up.
So, how do we shift from feeling like we can’t step away to creating the space we need? The first step is realizing that it’s possible—and that it’s worth it.
Now, I want to explore how to design a retreat that works for you – one that feels realistic, meaningful, and, most importantly, guilt-free.
How to create a retreat that feels possible and perfect for you
Let’s start by clearing up a common misconception: a retreat doesn’t have to take a lot of money, time, or effort. It doesn’t require plane tickets, fancy hotels, or even leaving your house if that’s not what you want.
The beauty of a retreat is that it’s entirely up to you. It’s about creating intentional time and space to recharge—on your terms.
For some of us, the perfect retreat might look like a weekend away at a quiet cabin, surrounded by nature. Maybe it’s an electronic-free day off with no emails, no deadlines, and no interruptions.
But for others, it could be as simple as a Saturday morning alone with coffee, a book, and no one asking for snacks. The key is figuring out what feels restorative and realistic for you right now.
If your time feels limited, start small. Could you set aside just two hours on a Sunday afternoon to do something you love?
Maybe it’s taking a long walk, taking a drive by yourself, listening to your favorite podcast, or even napping without guilt. Sometimes, the simplest things can feel like a retreat when we approach them with intention.
If you’re worried about logistics, start by asking for support. Could your partner take over parenting duties for a few hours? Could you block off a day on your calendar as if it were an unmovable meeting? Could you barter with another working mom to take care of each other’s kids?
It’s amazing how much time can open up when we’re willing to delegate and set boundaries.
But it’s important to know that planning is key. Pick a date, choose activities that bring you joy, and set an intention. No guilt. No confusion. Decide and make a plan.
For example, you might decide your retreat is about resting, so you plan a slow morning with journaling, followed by an afternoon nap. Or maybe it’s about recharging your creativity, so you spend the day exploring a museum or walking in a park.
The more intentional you are about your retreat, the more fulfilling it will be.
For example, I live 20 minutes from the beach, but I don’t necessarily love the sun and sand. For me, just taking a drive down to the beach, parking somewhere to overlook the water, and just watching the waves is one of my favorite retreats.
Other times it’s going to a bookstore, buying coffee, and spending a few hours browsing and reading. A few times when my kids were little, I went to a diner by myself for breakfast and just enjoyed not being responsible for anyone but myself.
For you, if guilt is creeping in, remind yourself of this: when you take care of yourself, you’re better for everyone else. Think of it as filling your own cup so you can pour into others. You’re not neglecting your responsibilities—you’re showing up for them with more energy and focus.
Even in the dead of winter, I’ll take a drive down to the beach on a Sunday during tax season to clear my head and feel restored before the next week begins.
If cost is a concern, remember that retreats don’t have to break the bank. Think about what makes you happy and what recharges you; that’s within reach. Maybe it’s a rom-com movie night at home, or a yoga class followed by your favorite treat.
If you’re still not convinced, reframe what a retreat means for you. Instead of thinking it has to be a grand escape, consider micro-retreats—smaller moments sprinkled throughout your week.
A peaceful drive with your favorite music, journaling for 15 minutes in the morning, or simply sitting outside and breathing in fresh air can all count.
The secret is to give yourself permission. Permission to say, “This is my time.” Permission to prioritize yourself without guilt. Permission to believe that taking a retreat—no matter how big or small—isn’t just possible, but necessary.
But if you want to make it a little more luxurious and you can afford it, consider treating yourself to something extra special. Maybe it’s a night at a cozy bed-and-breakfast, a spa day complete with a massage and facial, or a weekend getaway to a peaceful retreat center.
It could even be a simple hotel stay in your own city, where you can order room service, sleep in, and enjoy some uninterrupted quiet time. I’ve done this before and was amazed at how restorative it was.
Luxury doesn’t have to mean extravagant; it’s about indulging in what feels like a treat for you. Whether it’s splurging on a fancy meal, taking a yoga workshop, or spending the day exploring a new place, allowing yourself these experiences can make your retreat feel even more restorative and memorable.
The important thing is to design a retreat that fits your needs, your budget, and your life right now—whether it’s simple, luxurious, or somewhere in between.
So now it’s your turn – what would your retreat look like? What’s one thing you could plan this week, even if it’s just an hour, that feels like a step toward recharging? You deserve this time—not just for yourself, but for the people who depend on you to show up as your best self.
Questions to consider:
Question: What would your perfect retreat look like if there were no limitations?
Take a moment to dream big—what would you love to do if time, money, or logistics weren’t an issue? Would it be a weekend by a lake, a day at the spa, or simply a peaceful morning at home? Sometimes, allowing yourself to envision your ideal retreat helps you realize that parts of it might already be within reach. This question isn’t about making it perfect; it’s about uncovering what feels most restorative to you.
Question: What’s stopping you from carving out time for yourself?
Is it guilt, lack of support, or the belief that you’re too busy? Identifying the obstacles standing in your way is the first step to overcoming them. Once you understand what’s holding you back, you can start making small changes—like asking for help, setting boundaries, or reframing the idea of self-care—to create the time and space you need.
Question: How would taking time for yourself change the way you show up for others?
Think about how you feel when you’re running on empty versus when you’re rested and recharged. Taking time for yourself isn’t selfish; it’s how you ensure you can give your best to the people and responsibilities that matter most. Reflecting on the benefits not just for you, but for everyone in your life, can make prioritizing a retreat feel like a necessity rather than a luxury.