As an accountant and a mom, it would be nice to just flip a switch or turn on a faucet and drink from a fountain of motivation, especially when we have a lot to do and not much time to do it. When that long to-do list is just waiting for our attention, it would be nice to be able to quickly drink a warm cup of motivation and have the energy to plow through things.
The issue is that motivation is not always easy to find or maintain. At times, we can find ourselves feeling demotivated, uninspired, or just plain uninterested in the goals we have set or the things we need to get done.
Feeling unmotivated is tricky because it can manifest in various ways, and it can affect many different areas of our lives. It can show up in a lack of interest in activities, where you find yourself feeling bored or disinterested in activities that you used to enjoy, such as hobbies or socializing.
It can show up as procrastination, where you might delay starting or completing tasks, even if they are essential or time-sensitive. Or you might feel apathetic and have a general lack of enthusiasm or passion toward your goals or life in general.
Unmotivation can look like avoidance, where you might avoid situations that require effort, such as challenging tasks, difficult conversations, or confronting your fears. It can show up as low energy, where you may feel tired or lethargic, which can make it challenging to find the energy or motivation to do things.
Another common way you can spot unmotivation is by noticing negative self-talk, where you might engage in self-criticism or negative self-talk, which can lead to feelings of low self-esteem or a lack of confidence. Or it can look like a lack of direction where you might feel uncertain about your goals or lack a clear sense of direction in your life.
However it shows up in our lives, it’s important to recognize when we’re feeling unmotivated so that we can take action to overcome it if we need to. By understanding the reasons behind unmotivation and implementing strategies to overcome it, we can move forward with confidence and motivation toward achieving our goals.
Obviously, it’s not necessary to be “on” all the time, but it’s helpful to have a better understanding of where motivation comes from. It’s great to give yourself a break and not feed into the need to be busy all the time, but when you’re feeling unmotivated, it’s nice to know that when you need it, you have options.
This week I’m going to discuss why we often become unmotivated and how to overcome unmotivation.
Why we often become unmotivated
A lack of motivation can be a challenging obstacle to overcome, especially for busy accountant moms, but it is important to recognize that it is a common experience that most of us face. Why? Because we have a human brain.
Our brain is really important for our motivation. It makes chemicals like dopamine that make us feel motivated and happy. When we achieve something we like, our brain releases dopamine, which makes us want to keep doing that thing.
But when we’re not motivated, our brain’s reward system might not be working well, and it becomes hard to feel happy or rewarded from activities we usually enjoy. For example, when we reach a goal or get positive feedback, our brain releases dopamine, which makes us feel good. This encourages us to keep working towards that goal or doing that activity.
But when we face setbacks or failures, our brain’s reward system might not activate, and our motivation decreases. For instance, if a client complains or your child upsets you, your brain doesn’t release those feel-good chemicals that usually motivate you.
It’s also important to know that stress and feeling overwhelmed can affect our motivation. When we face challenging or stressful situations, a part of our brain called the amygdala becomes too active. This can increase anxiety and decrease motivation.
As accountants, we need to be aware of this because we often think stress and overwhelm are normal. That’s why many accountants are close to burnout.
When stress and overwhelm affect our motivation, we push ourselves even harder without realizing that stress and overwhelm are sabotaging our motivation. In other words, it’s like a no-win situation.
The more stress and overwhelm we feel, the less our brain releases feel-good chemicals, making us less motivated. Then we believe we need to push ourselves even more to feel motivated, but it doesn’t work.
To understand our brain in a simple way, let’s review what I’ve said before. We have two systems: System 1, the lower part I call the Toddler, and System 2, the higher part I call the Supervising Mother. Understanding these parts is important for motivation.
The higher brain is critical for motivation. It helps us set goals, plan, and prioritize tasks. When it works well, we can stay focused, manage time effectively, and maintain motivation.
But when we’re not motivated, the higher brain might not work well, making it difficult to set goals and prioritize tasks. If we don’t know what’s happening with our higher brain, it’s no wonder we struggle to get things done.
Chronic stress and anxiety also have a big impact on motivation. The amygdala becomes too active, releasing stress hormones like cortisol, leading to anxiety and decreased motivation.
So, if it’s normal to sometimes lack motivation because we’re human, what can we do about it?
How to overcome unmotivation
I think the first step in overcoming unmotivation is to stop trying to feel motivated all the time. As I said before, we’re burning ourselves out by trying to be on all the time.
We need to understand what we want to be motivated for and whether we actually like the reasons behind it. For example, you may feel motivated to finish a work project because there’s a deadline, but you might not need motivation to declutter your attic.
In simpler terms, just because you think something needs to be done doesn’t mean you have to be the one to do it. Feeling unmotivated can actually be a sign that the task you think requires motivation isn’t something you need to do.
Many of my coaching clients believe they must feel motivated before taking action, but that’s not always true. You don’t always need motivation.
The truth is, you can choose to feel determined or committed in order to achieve a goal. There were times when I didn’t feel motivated to write my book, but I was committed to finishing it within a year, and that commitment was enough to drive me into action.
But for those times when you’re certain something needs to be done and you like your reasons for doing it, here’s the good news: feeling motivated isn’t difficult. You just need to understand that your feelings come from your thoughts.
In other words, it’s not the task itself that makes you feel unmotivated; it’s the thoughts your brain has about the task. If you want to feel motivated, you just need to choose a thought that creates that feeling.
For example, it’s not the 20 tax returns with a deadline that make you feel unmotivated. It’s thoughts like “This is too hard” or “I have too much to do” or “There’s not enough time” that create the feeling of unmotivation.
The best part is that your brain not only causes you to feel unmotivated but it can also help you feel motivated when you need or want to. By simply choosing and practicing thoughts that create the feeling of motivation, you can easily feel motivated whenever you need to.
I’ve seen many coaching clients experience a transformation with this approach. They would come into a coaching session feeling uninspired or unmotivated, and within an hour, they would be completely motivated to take action and get things done.
They realized how much power they had. Instead of giving up or hustling, they learned how to engage their brain to overcome their lack of motivation.
I’ve coached employees who felt stuck in jobs they hated and lacked motivation to do anything about it, but they were able to understand how their brain was holding them back. I’ve worked with entrepreneurs who had business goals that weren’t being met, but they were able to identify why and how to take the necessary steps to achieve and surpass those goals.
By harnessing the power of their thoughts, they changed their mindset and unlocked a newfound sense of motivation. So, how can you apply this approach to overcome your own lack of motivation? Here are some practical things you can do:
Identify the thoughts underlying your lack of motivation: Start by becoming aware of the thoughts that contribute to your feeling of unmotivation. Notice the negative self-talk or limiting beliefs that arise when you think about the task at hand. Remember that it’s not the situation itself but your thoughts about it that are causing your lack of motivation.
Challenge your thoughts: Once you’ve identified your thoughts, question whether they are true. Are they based on facts or are they merely assumptions or self-imposed limitations? Challenge the negative thoughts and replace them with more empowering and positive ones. For example, instead of thinking, “This is too hard,” you can choose to think, “I am capable of handling this challenge.”
Practice visualization: Visualization is a powerful tool. Close your eyes and vividly imagine yourself engaged in the task with enthusiasm and satisfaction. Visualize the successful completion of the task and the positive outcomes that will follow. Visualize your future self having accomplished whatever you need to do.
Break tasks into manageable steps: Sometimes a task can feel overwhelming, which can dampen motivation. Combat this by breaking it down into smaller, more manageable steps. By focusing on one step at a time, you’ll feel a sense of progress and accomplishment, which can reignite your motivation.
Seek support and accountability: Surround yourself with individuals who inspire and motivate you. Share your goals and aspirations with them, and ask for their support and encouragement. Consider finding an accountability partner or working with a coach like me. Being held accountable can provide the external motivation and drive you need to stay on track.
Celebrate small victories: Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements along the way, no matter how small they may seem. Recognizing your progress reinforces your motivation and encourages continued effort. Reward yourself with something meaningful to you, whether it’s a treat, a break, or a moment of relaxation.
Be willing: I’ve saved the best for last. One of the easiest ways to overcome unmotivation is to be willing. For example, if you’re feeling unmotivated to exercise, ask yourself, “Am I willing to exercise?” Often, willingness can be the small push you need to take action.
Remember, motivation is not always constant, and it’s normal to experience ups and downs. Embrace the fact that you don’t always have to rely solely on motivation.
By cultivating determination, commitment, and willingness, you can push through periods of unmotivation and take action towards your goals. With practice and perseverance, you’ll develop the resilience and inner drive to overcome any challenge that comes your way.
Summary
As an accountant and a mom, it would be nice to just flip a switch or turn on a faucet and drink from a fountain of motivation, especially when we have a lot to do and not much time to do it.
A lack of motivation can be a challenging obstacle to overcome, especially for busy accountant moms, but it is important to recognize that it is a common experience that most of us face. Why? Because we have a human brain.