Today, I want to dive into a topic that resonates deeply with many working moms: the struggle to delegate. The reason this is important is that mastering the art of delegation is not just about lightening your workload—it’s about reclaiming your time, preserving your sanity, and, ultimately, nurturing your well-being.
As moms who work outside our homes, we often feel like we’re being pulled in a million different directions, trying to do it all and forgetting about ourselves in the process. But when we tackle the tough task of handing off some responsibilities, it’s like unlocking a whole new world—a world where we can actually concentrate on the things that really count, both at work and at home.
By learning to delegate well, we not only boost our success at work but also make room for deeper connections with our families and, most importantly, with ourselves.
Picture this: you’re at your desk, 50 unanswered emails flooding your inbox, and your phone buzzing nonstop with reminders and notifications. Meanwhile, at home, there’s a sink full of dishes, laundry waiting to be folded, and children wanting your attention. Sound familiar? You’re not alone.
One of the toughest challenges we deal with is handing off tasks to others. Why is it such a struggle to let go and ask for help? It all boils down to a mix of things that influence how we think, feel, and act.
I’m going to discuss these more in a minute, but the first issue is what some call the Supermom Syndrome—a sneaky idea in our culture that praises this idea of the perfect mom who juggles everything flawlessly.
Then there’s perfectionism—a tricky mindset that pushes us to be great while also making us scared to mess up.
Plus, there’s the never-ending battle with managing our time wisely and deciding what’s most important.
Well, today, I want to explain more about these issues, why you have trouble delegating, and help you get on board with delegating more.
This week I’m going to discuss why delegating feels impossible for working moms and strategies to help you start delegating more.
Why delegating feels impossible for working moms
Let’s start with Supermom Syndrome, the idea that would should be superheroes, effortlessly handling everything life throws at us. We see it everywhere, from magazine covers to social media, with pictures of moms who seem to have it all together.
But behind that perfect image, there’s often a lot of guilt and worry. Just the idea of asking for help can make us feel like we’re not good enough.
This pressure to do it all leaves many of us feeling stuck, trying to juggle too much at once.
This pressure isn’t just external—it’s internalized too. We start to believe that if we can’t keep up with this idealized version of motherhood, we’re somehow failing as moms. So, when it comes to asking for help or delegating tasks, it can feel like admitting defeat or admitting that we’re not living up to that Supermom image.
Plus, we’re smart women who can come up with very intelligent excuses or justifications for not delegating. See if you can relate to any of these:
“I can do it better myself”: Many of us believe that we are the only ones who can complete tasks to our high standards, leading us to hesitate in delegating tasks to others.
“It’s faster if I do it myself“: Some of us may feel that explaining tasks to someone else and overseeing their completion will take longer than just doing the task ourselves.
“I don’t want to burden others”: There’s a fear of imposing on others or feeling guilty for asking for help, which can stem from societal expectations or people-pleasing tendencies.
“I’m afraid of losing control”: Delegating tasks can feel like relinquishing control, and some of us may worry that others won’t complete the task as well or in the way we prefer.
“There’s no one I trust to do it”: Trust is a big factor in delegation. Some of us may struggle to find someone we trust to handle tasks as competently as we would.
“I don’t have time to train someone”: Teaching someone else how to do a task can initially take time and effort, which can feel like an added burden on top of an already busy schedule.
“I’ll just do it later”: Procrastination can be a barrier to delegation. Some of us may put off delegating tasks, thinking we’ll handle them ourselves later, only to find ourselves overwhelmed when the deadline approaches.
“I’m afraid of being seen as incompetent”: There’s a fear of judgment or criticism from others if tasks are delegated, leading some of us to avoid asking for help altogether.
The thing is, a fear of falling short and the guilt that comes with it can be incredibly isolating. It creates a cycle where we keep trying to do more and more, even when it’s not sustainable or healthy.
And that’s why breaking free from the Supermom Syndrome is so important—it’s about recognizing that it’s okay to ask for help, to set boundaries, and to prioritize our own well-being alongside our responsibilities.
Plus, many of us were raised by stay-at-home moms that we’re often comparing ourselves too. I know I was always thinking about all the things my mom did while I was growing up and then feeling the pressure to give my children the same childhood and then feeling guilty when I felt I didn’t measure up.
The second issue we deal with, especially as accountants, is perfectionism. It’s like a two-sided coin. On one side, it pushes us to be our best and do great things. But on the flip side, it can also hold us back.
The truth is that when we’re always chasing perfection, we feel this constant need to control everything—our work, our home, our family life. We’re afraid that if we let someone else handle things, they won’t do it as perfectly as we would.
But here’s the thing: the more we strive for perfection, the harder it is to achieve, especially when we’re juggling so many responsibilities. And that fear of not being able to do things perfectly ourselves can make it really tough to ask for help or let someone else take over a task. Does that resonate with you?
The problem is that trying to maintain this level of perfection is exhausting—especially when you’re already juggling so many responsibilities as a working mom. It’s like trying to keep a bunch of plates spinning all at once. And when you’re stretched thin like that, asking for help or letting go of control can feel like admitting defeat.
But here’s the reality: nobody’s perfect. And trying to chase perfection all the time is a recipe for burnout.
It’s okay to strive for excellence, but it’s also important to recognize your limits and give yourself permission to ask for support when you need it. That’s where delegating comes in—it’s about recognizing that you don’t have to do everything alone and trusting others to help share the load.
Even if you have other reasons why delegating might be a struggle for you, just know that it’s worth addressing them.
Strategies to help you start delegating more
Before I share some strategies to help you start delegating more, I want to point out that you’re already good at delegating. For example, if you use a dishwasher to clean your dishes versus cleaning them all by hand, or you use a washing machine and dryer instead of washing them by hand and hanging everything out to dry.
Whether you’re aware of it or not, you’re already delegating things; you’ve just probably not taken the time to look around at everything you’re good at delegating. But now it’s time to learn to delegate more, so let’s explore some actionable strategies:
Recognize Your Limits – Take a moment for some honest self-reflection. Consider the demands of your job, your family responsibilities, and your personal well-being. Recognize that you’re only human, and it’s okay to admit when you’re feeling overwhelmed.
For example, if you’re struggling to keep up with household chores while juggling a demanding work schedule, it may be time to acknowledge that you need some extra support. I’m not sure when it was, but a number of years ago, I decided that prioritizing having someone come and clean the house every two weeks was the best use of my time and money.
Once I saw how invaluable it was to delegate household cleaning, I looked for other things that I could delegate where the benefit outweighed the cost. From online grocery shopping to purchasing clothes from Stitch Fix, delegating the things that aren’t worth my time and energy has been incredibly helpful.
Shift Your Mindset – Challenge the notion of perfectionism and embrace the idea that delegation is a strength, not a weakness. You are still a valuable accountant and mother if you delegate.
For example, let’s say you’re working on a project with tight deadlines and struggling to keep up with all the tasks on your plate. Instead of shouldering the burden alone, imagine how much more efficient and productive you could be if you delegated some of the tasks to your team members.
By letting go of the need to control every detail, you empower others to contribute their skills and expertise to the project, ultimately leading to better outcomes for everyone involved.
Another shift you could focus on is overcoming feelings of guilt and fear of judgment. For example, if you’re hesitant to ask your spouse to help with household chores because you feel like it’s your responsibility as a mom, remind yourself that parenting is a partnership.
Have an honest conversation about your needs and concerns, and work together to find a solution that works for both of you. By letting go of the pressure to do it all, you create space for more meaningful connections with your loved ones and prioritize your own well-being.
Develop Delegation Skills – Effective delegation requires practice and skill development. Start by assessing your strengths and weaknesses, as well as those of your team members or family members.
For example, if you excel at budgeting and financial analysis but struggle with time management, consider delegating some of your administrative tasks to an assistant who excels in those areas.
I was just coaching a client who’s a partner in a firm and has difficulty setting and sticking to boundaries because she tends to be a people-pleaser. We decided that delegating her admin as the gatekeeper of her calendar was the best way to make sure boundaries were honored.
Another thing to consider with developing delegation skills is learning to prioritize tasks based on their impact, with high impact things being done first and communicating your expectations clearly to make sure that everyone is on the same page.
For example, if you’re delegating a project to a team member at work, provide clear instructions and deadlines, and be available to offer guidance and support as needed. Similarly, if you’re asking your children to help with household chores, be specific about what needs to be done and offer praise and encouragement for their efforts.
Building a strong support network is essential to successful delegation. Lean on your colleagues, friends, and family members for support, and don’t hesitate to ask for help when you need it. For example, if you’re struggling to balance work and family responsibilities, consider reaching out to other working moms for advice and support.
Our private CPA MOMS Facebook group is a great place to start. You can share your experiences and challenges and learn from each other’s successes and setbacks.
Sometimes seeking inspiration from others who have successfully mastered delegation can help boost your confidence or willingness. For example, if you have a mentor or colleague who excels at delegating tasks and managing their workload effectively, ask them for advice and guidance.
Learn from their strategies and techniques, and adapt them to suit your own needs and preferences.
By recognizing your limits, shifting your mindset, and developing your delegation skills, you’ll be well on your way to reclaiming your time, reducing stress, and achieving a better balance between work and home life.
Remember that delegation is not a sign of weakness. It’s a smart strategy for maximizing your productivity and effectiveness.
Summary
One of the toughest challenges we deal with is handing off tasks to others. Why is it such a struggle to let go and ask for help? It all boils down to a mix of things that influence how we think, feel, and act.
Even if you have other reasons why delegating might be a struggle for you, just know that it’s worth addressing them.